Zestful Blog Post #157
On Monday (April 18, 2016) I was listening to Diane Rehm’s show
on NPR while driving around to some appointments. I’m not a die-hard NPR
devotee, but I do tune in sometimes. The reason I’m not a die-hard devotee
to NPR is the bewildering language used by some of the guests—not so much the
hosts. Diane Rehm is blameless. Diane Rehm for president.
My beef is with the guests / interviewees who torture
language trying to make themselves sound more intellectual. Often, I’m sad to
say, they are writers. Writers who have written books published by intellectual
presses about intellectual things like social theories.
Having cut my teeth as a newspaper reporter and editor, my
anti-bullshit axe is sharp and fierce. Maybe I’m just getting older and
crabbier, or maybe the NPR problem is really getting worse. I think it’s
getting worse. Things were so bad Monday morning that I had to pull over not
once but twice, and make notes.
A group of guests were talking about Brexit. You know, the
possible exit of Britain from the European Union. The word Brexit is fine. It’s
a witty shorthand that one could text to friends when messaging about world
affairs.
But when one guest said, “The atmospherics of the summit
will be tense,” I was like, what did she just say? Atmospherics? Why would you
say that when you mean atmosphere? Oh, of course: to sound brainier! People who
use words with more syllables are perceived as being more intelligent than
ordinary folk. You have to listen with some alertness to notice when the extra
syllables are phony.
Here’s another one from the same conversation, different
guest, who was asked about reciprocity between Britain and the EU if Britain
Brexits. “Well, the automaticity of that will no longer be there.” What the
f*ck? Automaticity? Have you ever heard that word before? But you know exactly
what the guy meant: The reciprocity would go away. But when you’re in front of
a microphone, whether on the radio or a dais, air time is important. Fill it
with syllables, preferably ones that can more or less be grasped by people
dumber than you. Automaticity originated as a science word to describe certain
functions in cells, then became, according to the Free Dictionary: “Acting or
operating in a manner essentially independent of external influence or control:
an automatic light switch; a budget deficit that triggered automatic ...”
Automaticity is actually a perfect NPR word: It's unnecessarily complicated and
not really accurate, yet it’s easy to tell what the speaker means.
Side one of my angrily scribbled note card.
Another guest, discussing his book about the dangers
global aid workers face, used the term ‘sea change,’ which bugged me, because
the clearer, simpler ‘change’ would have sufficed. Sea change is a somewhat
archaic term referring to the shift in one’s perceptions, mostly having to do
with sense of balance, when one embarks on a long sea voyage. The movement of
the sea makes for lots of vestibular input, and one feels different, and
possibly out of sorts, until one adapts. MFK Fisher, by the way, wrote
beautifully (and economically) about the subject in The Gastronomical Me. People now use sea change to mean a vast
change. When you say sea change, you simply sound more worldly, don’t you?
The same guest said, “The safety of aid workers evolves onto
the local population.” He of course should have said devolved, but he was
either unsure of that, or he sensed many listeners would think devolve is
incorrect in that usage. But it’s correct. This example isn’t exactly parallel
to the others, but valuable nevertheless, to illustrate the deep insecurities
of many NPR guests.
Same guest: “Secondly, and probably most foundationally…”
Foundationally? Beautiful. So much more dolled up than basically. More
syllables, more letters. Same guest: “The latter question is of sentinel importance.”
Lovely! The term is completely meaningless, yet you instantly know that he
meant special importance, or more probably, signal importance. But sentinel! An
extra syllable! Not only that, but just the sound of it is so serious! Sentinel.
Yeah, man.
Do things like this bug the same crap out of you, or am I
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