Thursday, November 28, 2013

Solo Thanksgiving Essential

I have an important piece of advice for you if you should ever find yourself planning a Thanksgiving alone. It involves multiplication.

Years ago when I took a temporary management position in another state, I realized I would have the opportunity to be alone in my Residence Inn suite on Thanksgiving.

In the two times I've taken the Myers-Briggs personality sorter, I've tested once as introvert, and once as extrovert. Somehow I feel introvert is slightly more accurate, but it's not like I'm one of those people who don't know how to shoot the breeze with a bartender. But it was wonderful to contemplate a whole, low-key day alone in a quiet world, especially as I'd been working like a stevedore with scores of stressed-out retail employees.

I thought the classic thing would be to watch football on TV (my hometown team, the Detroit Lions, always play on Thanksgiving) and eat a turkey TV dinner.

So I made sure to stop at the store Wednesday after work, scored a Swanson's and a six-pack, and felt totally set. The next day I bowed my head in silent tribute to the Pilgrims and the Indians and remembered drawing hand turkeys in kindergarten. Come meal-time, I got out the Swanson's and popped it in the oven.

Here was the thing: It wasn't enough to eat. I'm no heavyweight, but when I took the thing out of the oven and settled in front of the tube, I was like, hey, what kind of Malibu Stacy meal is this? Belatedly I realized the portions were damn skimpy compared with a regular home Thanksgiving dinner. I fished the box out of the trash and looked at the nutrition information: only 330 calories. That, I figured, was about a fourth of what I would normally eat on Thanksgiving.

Tragically, the grocery store was closed, so I was forced to supplement my feast with a stale package of Lorna Doones from the cupboard.

Hence my Thanksgiving tip: If you're going solo, buy two or three Swanson's. And some fresh cookies. With enough beer, you'll be fine.

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  1. I always use Stauffer's when absolutely necessary to buy a frozen meal. I wonder if their Thanksgiving meals would be sufficient. What a depressing discovery for you that day. My mistake of the day is that I planned to color my hair before we go out today so I didn't pay any attention to the box. I opened it - too easily, got the stuff mixed and on my head and then discovered the cream rinse to set the color was missing. I gather the box had been opened and someone purloined the conditioner. Of course Walmart is closed. And I had only gone there because I couldn't find the color my hairdresser recommended any place else. So, I used a regular conditioner. Now I am not looking in mirrors. BTW I learned a good thing about Walmart - going there makes me feel thin.

    1. Oh gosh, Ronnie, I wish you the best re: the hair and Walmart.... I didn't know you were so hilarious!.. Thanks for dropping in.

  2. Good luck with finding Luck in your turf, Not in the frosty North, Chicka! Too bad we've got half a continent in between us. Three pounds of cranberries and apricot preserves, 21 pounds of bird, cornbread dressing and as much champagne or Riesling as needed. Wishing you joy!

    1. Wow, you're even gonna have great leftovers.... Joy back to you, Morgyn.

  3. What caught me as funny was the part about the six pack. All the women I know would trade the beer for a box of wine. Tabitha Maine


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