Thursday, July 5, 2018

Welcome the Bitch, Welcome the Bastard


Zestful Blog Post #271

The most-highlighted passage in the e-book versions of You’ve Got a Book in You is where I tell writers it’s essential to give themselves permission to write poorly. That passage resonates, because self-criticism dwells within all of us. But if you give yourself permission to produce crummy stuff, you will have the chance to improve. You may or may not improve, but you’ll have the chance.

But that’s just theory, right? The doubts and negativity that spew from the little bitch or bastard on your shoulder as you write—or sit there staring at your notebook or blank screen—are real. Yes! Those ugly, hissed words: Who the hell do you think you are? You suck. You can’t. You’ll never amount to anything as a writer because not only do you suck, your work sucks, and there’s so little of it! And everybody knows it. Anybody who says they find value in your work is just being phony with you because they feel sorry for you. What a crummy loser! Honestly. Hey, here’s an idea: Don’t you wanna check how many likes you got on your last post on whatever the hell social media? Right now? Hey, why don’t you just quit writing for now and go buy a tub of that gourmet ice cream? You’ll only eat a little bit of it. You’ll save the rest for tomorrow.

Right.

I mean, did you laugh? Because it’s so ridiculous when you see it all laid out.

Here’s the thing: You can never shut up the bitch or bastard on your shoulder by force. In fact, they love it when you try to force them to shut up. It just gives them more dramatic attention, more strength. So, what do you do? Welcome them. Listen coldly, then go, “Thanks for the shit, pal. I’ll listen to you again soon, but now I’m getting back to work. Chillax until we meet again.”


[When I tried to look at her objectively, in order to draw what she really looks like,
she disappeared. Baffling.]

The fact is, every master started out a klutzy, anxiety-stricken novice. The novices who prevailed to some level of competence learned a key mantra: “So what?”

And that’s all there really is to it. Your work is imperfect. So what? Mine is too. You didn’t get as much done as you wanted. So what? Neither did I. All that matters is that you do it. If the little bitch or bastard hammers at you, so what?

“So what?” is an incredibly freeing mantra.

Do you have any tips on how to work through a self-inflicted shitstorm? How do you pick yourself up if the bitch/bastard gets you down for a while? To post, click below where it says, 'No Comments,' or '2 Comments,' or whatever.
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14 comments:

  1. I write in a notebook, and when I haven't completed my word count, I carry the notebook with me. I'm not sure if I've ever written my current project in public, but I like knowing that I can finish if I truly want to. The act of carrying it helps me complete the work when I get back home. If you persist on a project, your brain wants you to quit all the time, but when you push through, your brain starts finding ways to make it easier: "You can do this;" "If X can do it, you can;" "Just do it your way and be unique." The helpful things that run through your head are harder to recall than the ice-cream example you provide above; my bastard suggests the Oh, Fudge! milkshake from Coldstone Creamery. And sometimes he wants to look at shoes.

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    1. Excellent, Rowe. And goodness, yes, shoes. XXOO

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  2. Great post! I've mentioned it on FB and also sent out a tweet.

    My suggestion about the nasty voice within: Imagine the voice coming from a little green gremlin sitting on your shoulder and hissing into you ear. Gently wipe it off your shoulder with your hand and say to it, "Not now." Be kind but firm.

    And remember that that little gremlin was born of the hurt and pain you suffered when you were little.

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    1. Mary, I like the gentle wipe. And I'm afraid you're right re: old, old injuries.

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    2. Great post. From one going through a current shitstorm, I find it helps to tell myself (aka the gremlin) "grow up - you think you've got problems?" because I know the whining self pitying crap comes from a rather pathetic kid inside me that refuses to lie down and die.

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    3. Anne, yes, I like your thinking.

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  3. Thanks for the encouraging words. So true!

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  4. At the GCLS Con right now, launching my 1st novel, which took 12 years to write because of that little shoulder muse you mention! I'll have to pass this blog around during break and collect groans and stories!

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    1. Congratulations, and please do share when you can. Tell the folks I say hi. Also, I'll mention your book next blog.

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  5. You've already defeated that little bitch or bastard because you're writing, and they're not. That means you'll end up with something you can improve. They won't. The hardest part of writing is showing up. They haven't managed that.

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